“Sunshine is beautiful when it’s after a rain. If there is sunshine everyday then it starts burning you. So, we need both rain and sunshine in our lives to value their importance and welcome rainbows in our lives“
While I was trying to pass another sleepless night pondering upon everything that’s going into my life suddenly this quote flashed into my mind. I don’t remember where I read it but it explained a lot of things. It made me realize that it’s okay one day clouds will step aside and sun will make its way in my life. Whenever I look back on the journey that I have covered so far the only thing that comes to my mind is how time has gone by so quickly and I have no idea about what I am doing, why I am doing things, how I got to this place where today I am?
Life is a series of ups and downs, one day it is like going well whereas the other day it’s like somebody pulled the rug from underneath and we fell badly on the ground.
Our human life is full of pain and discomfort it’s like no matter how hard we try to overcome every hurdle, we can’t get ahead. As a result, we start falling apart. Happiness is a goal that people don’t believe is achievable. Every person has their own way to show how broken they are. Some tend to confine themselves from all the man jack outside, some just go quiet and some even think of ending their life. As for me I used to sit around in the corner of my house sulking, not eating anything, not talking to anyone etc.
But that’s not the way how things work, we need to learn how to acknowledge this human life given to us. We need to understand the fact that there is a reason why we are selected to be here.
This reminds me of a poem that my hopelessly romantic heart wrote describing my journey of pain and agony that I had….
Her life was full of days competing amongst each other, which is worst is it today or the day before. As the saying goes by after every dark and gloomy night there comes a day with a bright and warm sunshine. However it seems like the darkness in her life could not be cured even with the brightest rays of light. Like all other days she woke up with an aim that whatever it is she will get through it. But no, everyone around her did everything in their approach to make her fall In a way that she won’t rise again anymore. And maybe they won that day she was unable to put her broken pieces along. Her eyes were numb, her body aching , and her heart was cold, it felt like the pain covered her and threw her into a place filled with darkness which had no doors. She tried to escape by shouting, asking help from the people she called mine but it seemed like those people she called mine stitched her mouth away. She thought this will all get over soon, this is all a hoax because her people can’t be the one causing her pain, that this is a nightmare that will end as soon as she is awake. However then she realised her eyes was open and genuinely it was her people tearing her soul apart not physically but in a way she will feel agonizing pain.
The worst part of being in an unhappy state is that even very small situations start to make you feel nervous, uneasy. The people whom you consider to be your saviors are nowhere to be seen when you need them the most. But being a strong person (which we all are but need someone or something that will keep on reminding us time to time) I decided to come out of it.
“I decided to look for my happiness even when I know it is an elusive little thing that won’t stay long but the least, I could do was to find it, hold it tight until again it slips away….“
So, I started looking for ways to feel happy again. The first thing that I did was to search the internet and literally there were many sites which claimed that you will find happiness if you try these 10, 15 or 5 methods every day. I found it funny but after carefully reading selected some ways that will make me feel alive. I even had a chat with different people and formed a list of ways that they use to feel happy again. So here are 7 ways that helped me out and gave me a chance to escape all the problems. Though it was for a very less time but even a small moment of escape from the world of worries gives you enough power to battle the problems coming forth.
1- love yourself and respect your body
No matter how bad the day was, no matter how dejected you feel and it’s like you don’t wanna get out of your bed or eat something just push yourself a bit. Brush your teeth even if you have done it in the morning, do that again, wash your hair and your body. Stand straight under a shower (this is what I do you can do in your own way) and try to focus just on the dripping sound of the water and you will genuinely see that for a moment of time you get to pass all the bad thoughts. Your body is like a home to your soul. If we live in a clean house, we automatically tend to feel a bit relaxed. So, take care of yourself and love yourself.
2-Try to indulge yourself into different activities
I’ll mention some which I do. I start cleaning my room and even my own house.
If not this I start writing whatever is going on in my life I just write it and it’s like I discussed it with someone and feel relieved. These records will help you and will remind you that you have been able to tackle every situation and will even motivate you that, no matter how hard it is but you will get through it.
You can even try to uplift your mood by reading something good. I prefer to choose a small book because at such a time we just don’t want to get ourself into lengthy stuff so go for small books. You can even recite poems that reminds you of all the good times.
Some get this upliftment by cooking. Go for it cook something good and treat yourself and others with some nice stuff.
3- Don’t listen to sad music
Many of us try to drown our sorrows by listening to music. But according to me you should not listen to music. Don’t reinforce your pain.
Instead listen to podcasts, interviews of actors, stand-up comedy and try to just cheer yourself up and let those white teeth shine.
4- Don’t just remain tucked inside your room.
Sit in the sun without anything to do, feel the heat of the rays hit your skin, realise that this sunlight has traveled a very long way to reach you. Walk around barefoot and try to feel as much of the ground under your feet as you can.
Sit quietly for a while and notice the touch of breath in your nostrils, feel how the air gets cooler when you inhale and hotter when you exhale.
Sit under the moonlight sky, admire the stars and the moon. Understand how small we are and how immense the universe is. Let your heart swell with amazement and admiration of life.
5- Don’t fake it
Fake it ‘til you make it is not real life.
Happiness doesn’t mean being happy all the time. Life is full of ups and downs, so don’t strive to feel good all the time. Being alive means having the privilege to feel all of the feelings and have all of the thoughts humans can conjure up. When you try to block all of the feelings that are allocated to you as a human, you don’t get to experience life to the fullest. So, it’s not bad if you get sad for some time. Just don’t force yourself, let your soul feel everything you just need to make it realise that nothing lasts for long and be there with it.
6- Accept the fact that life is a difficult journey.
Remember that life is not all butterflies and rainbows and that you only get rainbows after it rains, and butterflies only appear after a caterpillar has gone through a tremendous transformation. Struggle is required in human life in order to find the sunshine.
We don’t just wake up happy, we need to work for it and work on it.
When you allow struggles into your life and don’t dramatize them, you can make the most of any situation and grow from it, like the caterpillar turning into a beautiful butterfly.
7- Don’t rely on other people to make you feel happy
It’s not other people’s job to make you happy and you will be a big fool if you will let your happiness work according to others. You have to take your responsibility on yourself. You don’t know what the other person is going through and neither can you ask them to act according to you so it should be in you that you don’t have to get affected by their harsh words.
According to Firestone, our “critical inner voice is actually triggered when we take steps forward” that reminds us to “stay in our place and not to venture out of our comfort zone.”
There are times when we keep on believing the fact that we can never be happy, but if you want to shine, you need to release yourself from that thought and give yourself permission to allow happiness to come from within you.
I can’t say that the above-mentioned points will also help you the same way but can assure you that they will definitely aid your hurting soul if practiced daily. So, I would like to conclude with the lines of one of my favourite songs
Yeh Hosla Kaise Jhuke
Yeh Aarzoo Kaise Ruke – 2
Manzil Mushkil to kya
Dhundla Sahil to kya
Tanha Ye Dil to Kya
Raah Pe Kante Bikhre agar
Uspe to phir bhi chalna hi hai
Shaam Chhupale Suraj magar
Raat ko ek din Dhalna hi
Rut ye tal jayegi
Himmat rang layegi
Subha phir aayegi
************
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Also detachment as a practice. Once you detach yourself with the outcomes, you feel happiness with everything.
yes , some degree of detachment happens automatically wen we start thinking more about our well being and our happiness… we stop bothering about things or people who disturb us in someway or the other.
[…] humans are a mixture of multiple emotions. Happiness, sadness, fear, joy, disgust, surprise, trust, anger and so on. It is said if you want to be a […]